Considering......

You know how people have life verses?
The verse that Ski added to our blog title is my life verse. That shouldn't be too surprising if you know anything about our life. There is always a crisis du jour. When we share new news on the latest that we are going through, our friends have been known to give a chuckle. The past few months have been rather eventful and give us more opportunities to give thanks and consider.

Ski decided to use up his vacation and take off the week between Christmas and New Years off. We had toyed with going to Atlanta, but that never happened. We had a joyous Christmas together and then..... Ski hadn't been feeling well all Christmas day. The kids had been sick with colds and other illnesses were going around. Ski wondered if he was coming down with something. Since I was still sleeping on the couch, when I fell asleep Christmas night on the couch, Ski left me there. I woke around 4am to hearing him moan. He told me it was just another gall stone attack. He had had two back in September and so it was old hat to him. Around 7am, I was awakened again and as soon as the doctor's office opened, I had him call for an appointment. We went in and they did blood work and the dr was a bit concerned because this time, Ski had pain in his back. He sent us to the hospital for an abdominal CT. We looked a bit silly with Ski pushing me in a wheel chair and HE was the patient. We got the results so fast that it was frightening. Everything but the gall bladder looked good. The dr wanted us back the following Fri for a follow-up.

Sat and Sunday passed without event, but in the wee hours of Monday morning, I was awakened in our bedroom by the sounds of moaning. In the dark, I tried to look around, but didn't see anything. I called out to Ski and I heard a feeble response. He was laying on the floor. He told me that he had a slight fever and at that point, he wanted to go to the er. Instead of going to the closest hospital, we drove to the one where we had the CT done. I urged dh to get dressed while I tried to not fall all over myself in my barely awake state. By the time we arrived at the ER, his pain had subsided. I was concerned because the dr had told us to watch for a fever. I told Ski that he could go home ONLY if he didn't have a fever anymore. I drove to Walgreens and bought a thermometer and thankfully, he was no longer running a fever.

On Friday, we saw the dr and were referred to a surgeon. We are now scheduled for surgery on Jan 26th. It is outpatient unless the surgeon has to make an open incision. Ski is actually looking forward to having the troublesome gall bladder removed. I am sure if yours has ever given you any trouble, you will be able to understand. I am told that an attack is like labor pains except that it is constant and doesn't come in waves.

This past Monday, we saw the eye doctor. It was a thrill a minute. Ski had an uneventful visit. However, I was told I need bifocals. I am not very happy about this. It makes me feel old and my eye doctor had little compassion for my injured vanity. Of course, it didn't help that I am presently walking with a cane. The combination makes me feel absolutely elderly.

Now, you get to see a bit of my heart and what I think about. I have known for two years that I have a Chorodial Nevus. This is basically a mole in your eye. Like a mole on your skin, it can always change into melanoma. Strangely enough, even though I have been seeing eye doctors since around the age of 7, no one has ever mentioned this to me before. When they first saw it 2yrs ago, I decided to go to an ophthalmologist and have it checked out. There they took pictures which involved shining the most obnoxious bright light imaginable in your eyes. Their assessment at the time was that while it appears benign, it is in the worst place imaginable. Fast forward 2 yrs and the eye doctor was extremely fascinated by my eye. This was not a comforting thought. She once again mentioned the inconvenient location -- basically overlapping my macula and also close to my optic nerve. In the pic above, the macula is the gray spot and my nevus is on the left side of the macula and towards the optic nerve on the left. This means that if the thing ever grows, I will be in big trouble. An even more discomforting thought was that she handed me a grid for macular degeneration and asked me if I saw wavy lines. When I said no, she handed me the paper to take home with me. I'll tell you, I didn't get any warm fuzzies from that conversation.

I have to lay this one at His feet and leave it alone. It is another chance for me to consider. I consider how awesome God is in his creation of the human body. And I am amazed at the intricacy of His design. And in realizing this, I am reminded that God knows exactly where my nevus is and he knows what tomorrow has in store for me. He knows if it will grow and He has designed this trial just for me. God is always good and His plans are always to prosper me. I know that He will care for my my beloved Ski and that He will also care for me. And he has given me the example of three men in my life who lived full and happy lives with the partial or complete loss of their eyesight. So once again, I have the opportunity to rejoice and be grateful for the circumstances that God has placed me in.