Wave After Wave

My son asked me the other day if I could swim to the other side of the ocean.
I laughed.
But it wasn't because of the obvious.
Sure, it is a silly thought to think that someone could swim the ocean.  And yes, I did tell him that it wasn't possible.  I also explained to him that when my ancestors came over from Europe, sailing from a port in Rotterdam and aiming for the destination of Philadelphia, it was supposed to take only several months.
But I was thinking of other things.

The sea is one of my favorite places to visit because it causes me to contemplate God.
In fact, I can not fathom how anyone could stand at the end of a stretch of beach and not think about God.  I'm here on a vacation, but  walking the sandy stands and listening to the waves, I think about God, life, and my place in it.

So much has been going on in my life lately.
Added up, it is very little.

It's just the little bits.
Yet, I often feel like life comes at me wave after wave. 
Crashing on the shore of my soul. 
Trying to snatch pieces of my steadfastness until it slowly erodes away. 
I particularly felt the need to clear my head this year.
Not really clear my head.
More like clear my soul.
I feel mentally worn down by just life.
Little things.
The daily grind.
Responsibilities.
Conflict.
Discouragment
The constant barrage of slow and steady trial that hammers away.
Endlessly

So there I found myself standing at the edge of the earth looking out upon the sea.
Feeling helpless.
Feeling sad. 

And then
God stepped in and redirected my gaze.
Through the clouds of my feeble understanding, I began to see things differently.
That sea.....how vast....how vast is my Lord's love for me. 
Endless....
Deep....
Truly vast.
He designed all of this sometimes insane life for my benefit. 
For my growth. 
So I become more like Him.
What I see as wave after wave of trial,
Is wave after wave of goodness and grace.
Constantly pounding and pouring upon my messy life.
Forming it into something else.
Changing my heart.
Ever so slowly....except those times when huge chunks fall away.
Like when the hurricanes come and thrash around me
While the eye settles overhead.

I understood...
It is not my steadfastness that falls away, but my pride and stubbornness and arrogance.
How dependent I am upon the sea. 
Upon the Lord.
He takes bits away and tosses...
No
Beats relentlessly
Goodness upon me.
Showering kindness.
I am flooded with love.
Ever changing me.
Moment after moment.
Trial after trial
Wave after Wave.